Stress (by )

Well last week I had to go and tell college I didn't have enough money for the tuition fees and what actually was going on here - this wasn't pleasant but they said to carry on anyway for now and to sort out doing my minni project.

For this project I have to choose one of the listed subjects talk to the supervisor, keep a log book of meetings etc.... collect the data, learn about the analytical technic and then do a 7000 word write up (oh and background reading) and an oral presintation including a powerpoint presintation.

They handed out the topics before Christmas and said choose over christmas and talk to the supervisor after christmas or if you are really keen you can do it before Christmas. We handed in our second 3000 word essay (On carbonado diamonds in my case) pretty much on the last day of term.

I then wasn't sure if I was going to be allowed to stay and we only went back on Monday last week. I tried to go and see the supervisor last week but he wasn't in his office except when I was actually heading to the lecture - he wasn't in it before hand and he wasn't there afterwards.

So I came in early to see him today and the other girl from my course was in there with him - this was fine we had discuessed it and I knew she was going for the project too. I had even checked with the course coordinator that two people could do the same project.

The other girl only does planetary stuff and as it was the only planetary project I felt she should have first dibs at it.

So I had stealed myself for being told no, but thought there was a good chance of a yes as I had checked the previous week. What I wasn't expecting was to be told that its too late to be starting the projects and that they should have been started a month ago! Which would have actually been Christmas >:(

I was already feeling out of sorts and this was a blow. I went back to the classroom and one of the others asked me how I was - I couldn't speak I just shook my head.

Then Nesha asked me how it had gone and I told her what had just been said. She was upset that she'd pipped me to the post by 10 minutes but I told it was ok - turns out he told her off too :/ She gave me half her chocolate bar which was nice and made me feel alot better.

It was the being told off that I had issue with - I was prepared not to get the project and as a geologist I have more options open to me than her. (She did both moon essays).

Anyway I had just finished explaining what other project I would go for when one of the guys came in and said he'd had to change direction as the project he was going to do the data wouldn't be avaliable until just before the deadline. He'd chosen my second choice - I think an expletative left my lips but he said that he'd just checked with the course coordinator and she'd said that two on a project was fine - sigh.

I had had a stressful morning anyway with the fact that Barbara came in when we were trying to get out of the house (late as usual) and gave me information about a guy to use for scouts but she said II had to phone him before 12 as she said I would and it was 11 already adn I was trying to get to Stroud for my train.

Anyway I tried to phone and it was a wrong number :/

And I knew that it would all end up some how being my fualt that I hadn't contacted him before noon :/ I phoned Al and left an answer phone message and later on he tried to find Barbara but she was out.

This and money worries and the genrally feeling that the world is coming to an end and winter just isn't going away ment that during my actual lecture which was really interesting (Geochronology) I was asking my normal barral load of questions but with a difference.

My stutters back.

It was so bad the lecture was having to finish my sentances for me 🙁

I think it must be stress.

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