The Programmers Lamment (by )

I want feed back on this poem - I'm not sure how to set it out for a start - I was supposed to be writing in two line stanzers - free verse but I dont really under stand what that means so I gave up with the formal structure and wrote what came into my head - warning it does sort of contain a swear - not my fult blame the programmers.

Would lovew feed back - be harsh

Tap, tap, tapping away, Fingers flying, strange graceful dance

Notice not as light fades, consume all energies, forking demons, spawned zombi child

Dance logic, time

Tap tap tapping away, polish finger tips over letters worn

Hunger burns, Sandwitch forgotten, cat licked, stale,

Animalistic, persuing prey, Python here, Chicken there

tap tap tapping, wrist support frayed, mundane treasures, Ruby, Perl

Water sits, bubble strewn, littering your domain

Intently stare, bugs annialated, or so you prey

tap tap tapping, spinning ball, shift to corner, back again

3 am, time for sleep, red eye raw

cup of coffee, jar of beans

headaching, back stooped, so much to sort, so much to do

tap tap tapping. between the sheets, misty bruised dawn, comes and creeps

Power low, reserves giving out, drowsy talk, lisp, dialected, scheme

thought process hard, more tests more

Leached knowledge, sleep, dream, Brainfuck, But still keen


  • By Charlee, Thu 28th Jun 2007 @ 4:11 pm

    Should Pathon be Python or am I missing something? Otherwise, really cool 🙂

  • By sarah, Thu 28th Jun 2007 @ 5:18 pm

    yep - fixed

  • By Angie, Thu 28th Jun 2007 @ 11:49 pm

    Stanza means division of a poem consisting of a series of lines arranged together in a recurring pattern of metre and rhyme. So although this is an informative and imaginative piece of work, it is not "two line stanza". As an example I am quoting two verses of my "Ode to a Fat Girl" written 35 years ago, and I believe is probably in 2line stanza.

    Sixteen stone plus, Oh dear, what a mess, Go in a shop, an outsize dress.

    All that we have are there on the rack, but they're made for granny not my young back

    Hope this helps,

  • By junieann, Fri 29th Jun 2007 @ 11:25 pm

    Yep Angie is right a stanza means a poem measured by lines and beat in rhyme, think of phonics.

    3 5 7

    3 5 7

    and so on = a stanza

    hope this helps

    Love 2 u all

    A. Junie.x

  • By sarah, Tue 3rd Jul 2007 @ 9:53 am

    Thanks 🙂

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