Happy New Year 2017 (by sarah)

The new day dawned on the new year and we were all still snoozing in our nests of clean bedding. We'd changed the lining so we would have clean sheets for the new year - symbolic.

We had a lovely night last night with wish stars and fire and The Rats of Nim, and there are photos which I hope to get around to sharing.

Today we got up at 12, lunch time. And made our resolution and goal setting jar. We burnt our wishes last night so that they could fly free (plus I can never shake the idea that burnt things go to heaven - this idea got lodged in my head at 7 yrs of age when my nan died and was cremated I would make her things and cut them up and burn them so they could go up to heaven for her - I got very distressed when I realised a lot of rubbish got burnt!).

We each picked a colour and then cut A4 paper in that colour into 8 (some of us used more than one sheet some of us less), we wrote the resolutions and how we are planning to carry them out, we wrote goals and little action plans, Mary mostly drew hers. We then rolled them up, popped a loom band round and dropped them in the jar. Some of them we shared and some we didn't, for ones that are secret "Don't Read" was placed as a label on the rolled up scroll.

There are extra sheets in the four different colours plus a little bag containing pencils and loom bands in the top of the jar. The jar is huge and once contained stuffed olives - it still smells vaguely of garlic but that is being seen as a feature. We plan to keep the jar highly visable so as not to forget and to help keep the pace up and also we aim to review the contence at the equinoxes and solstices and any other time we think it appropriate. Again this is to keep momentum up.

Mary saw me knock a leek down that was waiting for composting as we ended up with ALOT of leeks this year. This lead to a humourous half hour of word play about me leaking on the floor and at one point calling Jean down from upstairs to help clean up Mary's leeks as she'd leaked all over the downstairs of the house :)

Jean rolled her eyes and then giggled and then proceeded the Leek Summoning or nest building as the demi-deamond Mookie Moo (Mary) called the leek construction. I pointed out to Alaric that they had gotten lots of things for Christmas and what was it they were playing with? Shrivelled up leeks. There were arguments over how many sides there should be, Jean said 5 Mary said 6 we pointed out that traditionally it is 7 or on the discworld 8. Like all good kids they ignored us and continued with their game which was actually two separate games but hey they were playing co-opratively with each other - something both of them had put down as a resolution.

Then we went off to the cinema to watch Newt Scaramanga unleash havoc on New York - Mary cried when we said we were going to the cinema to watch a Harry Potter movie, she wanted to watch Frozen there if we had to go and why couldn't we watch it at home? She cheered up once she found it was not one of the films we had at home even though we had explained that multiple times on route!

Me and Jean are of the opinion that Newt looks like Matt Smith if he'd been turned into a shop manikin and then back into a human - weirdly melted.

I have no idea what happened in the fight scenes as I had to hide from them but yeah no slurred speech just slightly tingly arms and a bit of virtigo! :)

There were tears today - mine as I feel short changed by the universe and also like I have no right to feel like that... I was ill and stuff as a kid with blood transfusions and walking aids and hearing and speech issues etc... but I thought I'd grown out of it, I thought I'd grow up big and strong and then I was grown up and I tried to do the stuff you need to be big and strong to do.... I failed. Alaric asked me what I'd invisioned myself doing as a grown up and so I told him... climbing mountians, deep sea diving, exploring... maybe even going to space.

I find it hard to let go of dreams. I wanted to find new things and explore. He says you can do this without physically going and picking up rocks, I say I know I tried that but the physical location of labs in some institutions meant I couldn't get into them or it was exhusting to do so and it was still the consolation prize and I still failed at it. He reckons there is new stuff everywhere to find, I'm having trouble seeing that - I said the closest I get these days in writing my novels, notice the mary-sues or janes or what ever they are called of sick people designing exo-skeletons or waldos or other to get around physical issues???

And having said all this I am probably the fittest and healthiest I have ever been bar my brain not working properly... oh the irony it's always something...

And I am lucky, I am alive, I have explored things, this summer I got to go to South Africa, I got to see whales, I've always wanted to see whales!!! I got to read the landscape and talk to people who helped end apartied, I got to see the southern hemi-sphere for the second time in my life. That is amazing, that is more than most of the earths population, I have a big house and kids in amazing schools, I have a hubby who doesn't hate me for keep getting ill or sick or injuried. Who is my best friend.

I have friends, friends who have not abandoned me when my brilliance of mind was dulled, friends who did not run away though none of us can be there always because we all have lives and that is a two way street, a cyclic thing, they helped when they could, and we have done the same, we've stopped each other from drowning.

So I am a ball of confused emotions, the more better I get from the head injury the more frustrating I am finding the issues it has left me with but I am also amazed at what I have.

Maybe next year my Christmas can be filled with sparkling lights again - I miss them but if I can't have them then I can do what we've done this year and just ask people to visit us and have events here.

After a year of multiple redundencies Alaric has a good job and we are even looking at getting a car!

Life is good, our plans are solid, we are almost where we thought we'd be 10 yrs ago :)

The coming year will be full of creating and making and videos of much of it as they are easier than big junks of writing at the moment and serve almost the same purpose!

Also Salaric Craft and How To blogs have just had their tenth Christmas so you will be seeing a lot of stuff to do with that, and the Wiggly Pets blog was set up in the summer of 2007 so prepare for more zines and photo stories and the like!

I like acting - I know I've come to this conclusion late in the day but I did an advert and the Fright House stuff, in 2015 I did a music vid and docu-drama. I'm not sure how to get more of this sort of stuff but I will be looking!

Alaric needs to get time to work on his projects - he has stuff that humanity needs... most of his time "off" ie redundent got taken up with infrastructure stuff in the house/server migration.

2017 here we come!

Apparently there will be stargazing and photography :)

Failing (by sarah)

I've failed at morning - there is pink tooth paste on our bed and Mary only half dressed in the car for school :( Still I think that is the first proper melt down we have had so far this term with getting ready in the mornings so... getting there - of course Jean has taken the bright turquoise coat to school so I am sure we will be getting a letter or she'll be getting a detention or something about that as she's only allowed black ones :/ To be fair her black one is at the school drying out from yesterday still but she was supposed to take my coat!

My chest is still bad and I've failed to finish decorating the girls rooms. I've now been ill since the 2nd of November and am BORED. Hoping it will sort itself asap.

Yesterday was a System of A Down and Cradle of Filth et al kind of day, Jean came home sans coat and bag as they were too wet and she'd been lent other things in their sted. Which was a relief as I thought she'd gone out in the torrential rain without anything!

Today I wonder if she's remembered her jujitsu bag as she's going straight from school with her friend and I forgot to remind her - I can see the bag from here but that does not mean she hasn't got the trousers and t-shirt with her - the jacket is just too bulky for her to carry in with all her school things.

Maybe I'm letting her down by not sorting it all out, by not driving etc - I hope she is just becoming independent. She's actually pretty epic at organising herself considering she is organising herself and she is mine and Al's daughter and she is only 11.

Rain like this always makes me worry - in 2007 before Gloucester but in Gloucestershire we were flooded and ended up being out of our home for about a year. Rains since have caused issues with the new houses roof etc... and though I know that means it's now a good roof... the fear is there tangled in my brain, if it rains heavy I feel I should go and just check that things aren't flooding - because you know I'd be able to do something about it if it where :/

I'm all mouth ulcery - and run down... thinking it's the aneamia, thinking it's still on running issues of having gotten low levels of gluten etc... over the summer etc... but I don't know.

There are happy things to write about just feeling a little deflated so thought I'd share what was going on. Alaric's new job is great - he's loving it but due to traffic in Cheltenham he is not getting home until gone 7 at night and because he does school run in the mornings he's gone for like 12 hours to do do his 9 hr job. This is the first time I've been on my own on my own in the house everyday since having kids... there has always been a kid about and/or a husband. It's weird because instead of the relief of them having their 2 days in nursery it's like... the house is EMPTY.

I think I'm getting less done but I also think I'm getting more done as I am doing the new rest regime from the doctor to try and get the head bang healing properly.

Tomorrow there is coffee with a friend and at some point I need to go and pick up some bits from another... I have stalls to organise for Salaric Craft and The WigglyPet Press for December and I need to decide weather to shut down my Patreon account due to the fact I think I'm going to end up triple taxed on income that otherwise would be taxed once max.

It's a shame I like the platform... :/

Anyway I will now go and up load pics so I can get back to cutsie blogging and political rants.

Colouring Book Poll (by sarah)

Obviously I have only just launched A Stranger Dream: Love

a non-linear visual poem as a colouring book but... well people have been asking about other books - now I have a long list of other potentials but thought I'd see what people want :)

Trying to decide what type of ink style colouring in book to draw next - so here's a poll! tweet me "other" too :)

— Sarah Snell-Pym (@Saffy) May 6, 2016

Yes it's on twitter - I'm not quiet sure how this works but if you can't click the options on there then just comment :) Also I am happy to consider other suggestions :)

Thanks muchly :)

A Stranger Dream – Virtual Launch Party (by sarah)

I am a poet, I am an artist, I am many things some of which seem contradictory - after the head bang last year the question of identity reigned large in my vision of self - not just my identity but everybody's and societies reactions to identity issues - so I started working on a series of images.

I was learning how to draw again and the ideas were appearing faster than I could create them, I spent 3 months working on the visuals for A Stranger Dream. And mainly I have had positive feedback though some people do hate the style and that is fine it is stark, it was meant to be.

But what is A Stranger Dream? Well for a start it is not A Stranger Dream it is A Stranger Dream: Love but it's not it is

Love: A Stranger Dream...

It is a non-linear visual poem on identity, gender, our place within family, our concentric non-ecludian intersecting and exclusionary circles of all the cultures of us - it is the distorting mirrors within our own heads - the fitting and the not fitting - the fires within.

I know it doesn't look it but it was a hell of a lot of work.

Then someone said "it says colouring in book to me" and I thought... why not?! I thought people colour to relax, to sort thoughts, to just be themselves and that is fitting - plus colouring in book is on the list of to-dos and I have been producing colouring in sheets for my kids workshops for ages.

So I started by popping the images up as individual sheets for download and colouring - they are still there and they are free.

Then I made ring bound ones at home for shows and events... people far away started asking how they could get hold of them so I have created a colouring in book complete with purple spine and title box because... I am the Purple Poet!!!!

Here is a picture of the spiral bound ones at The True Believers Comic Book Festival earlier this year.

And this weekend (April 22-14 2016) I am having a launch party - sadly I am only running a virtual one but it is going to be epic!!!

I will be pinging around the internet - of course hoping people will buy the book but as I said don't feel you have to because I put the individual sheets out there for free download and I know times are tight (having said that I need to buy more art supplies... to you know produce more art!).

There is a Facebook Event, a Google+ Event, a twitter hashtag # astrangerdream and my patreon account (which will have hidden extras in it for patreons only). There are also the blogs namely this one and Turquoise Monster which is my poetry blog :) So I think that is pretty much everyone covered - I am hoping to do a little film thingy too but we will have to see how the laptop holds up!

The colouring book is already up on Amazon and Book Repository etc... it is appearing as £10 odd - I meant it to be roughly £7 if you've bought the £10 copy let me know as I have a little goody bag to post to you containing some lovely tie-in items :) (yes I am trusting people to be honest here! Thankyou :) )

Oh and there should be a gallery unveiling where people can post pictures of their colouring in - if they wish :)

There are going to be give aways but there will also be merch for sale and special offers etc... (sorry guys I would love to give you everything for free but I do need a new computer!).

I am actually stupidly excited about this and am even making myself an outfit out of the art work! The poetry cards have arrived and are beautiful in a way I was not expecting :)

Most of all though regardless of weather you buy or take for free or just look - mainly I hope everyone will be enriched by the work itself, it was very important to me whilst creating it. It's kind of an imprint of the soul, maybe a darker one than people would like but it is... something - I'm not quiet sure what.

I hope you will join me for turning the starkness into a rainbow.

Park Run Issues (by sarah)

So a while ago now as in more than a year ago I went to the Ignite talks in Bath (part of a Tech festival I believe) to tell the world about why I designed Cuddly Science - the theme was Tech/Science for the wider good or something like that.

Whilst there we came across a group who had made a system for timing people and getting people to run and train and do exercise together. Without it costing the participants a butt load of money because that is a huge issue with exercise - I know when I was younger and even now I never really went to the gym or swimming that much because they cost money.

In fact one of the big draws of working at the campsite was that I got to use the climbing wall, lake, rifle and archery ranges for free after work (which was teaching those things except lake stuff due to pathetic swimming abilities). At uni I wanted to take part in loads of things but it was all too expensive and had a tendency to mount up cost wise but I did manage a bit of caving and Kung Fu.

My own struggle with wheelchairs and walking aids has shown how much of a difference having access to equipment can make not to mention people to encourage you and kind of group learning when you are doing things wrong as well.

Part of my miraculous recovery resulted from me having enough money to get a recumbent exercise bike with back rest and large wide padded seat - with a busted pelvis there was no way I could even get on a normal bike. But the bike, pool, chin up bar, pedometers etc still set me back hundreds of pounds because equipment is not cheap and needing what I did meant I couldn't just wait for free cycle and though social services where brilliant in providing me with bedsticks and aids to get in and out of baths etc... they could not provide what I needed for my physio. (to be fair I have bought all this stuff over like a decade but I did kind of need it in one hit and the thing is that because I was going to have to get a taxi or something to the gym in the first place the cost of gyms for a couple of months was enough to get the bike etc... and I can use it whilst the kids play at home etc...).

I digress some what - the point is there needs to be free stuff our health is kind of dependant on it. People need to climb, swim, run, we need a variety of stuff so those with various injuries or medical conditions which the longer you go in life is more likely to be you, can exercise.

This did not used to be such an issue but it is with modern lives and yes we could argue about that for a millenia and not change a single thing. Bikes are expensive, bikes get stolen or damaged but... there are great projects a foot to refurbish old bikes so they are accessible to everyone - fit free clean transport for the win (just please don't moan about me and my kids being in the cycle lane when the vegetation has grown over our pedestrian bit of path and hey they are scooters anyway! and never mind there is a mobility scooter coming and we all need to navigate the hideous junction with the lorries and more lanes than I can work out).

Back home in Essex and London there is gym equipment in the playgrounds or rather in the parks just outside the playgrounds - for grown ups to use! And people use them - for FREE (except you know they are paid for by taxes and that is the sort of thing I want my tax spent on!).

So bikes good, walks good (whilst we still have access and the national parks to walk in :( ), and we have basically already lost swimming and climbing as free accessible things unless you are really lucky - but running and pull ups etc... there are games set up to help walkers and runners, Bristol even has a playable city!

And that brings us to the reason that I am writing this post - Bristol.

They want to charge the Park Run runner with path maintenance - something most of them will already be paying for in tax. They are saying they can't expect the non-runners to pay for it equally - erm... but community, society, COMMON SCENSE!

Because yes people cause erosion - big problem with some areas of outstanding natural beauty and so on but there is a lot of wear and tear from just WALKING, from dogs scratching, bikes biking, kids scooting... also are they planning on charging everyone to just run? Regardless of weather you are with the Park Run?

Charging for the free sports and exercise that will help people lead fitter and healthier lives - which will drastically reduce the cost on the nhs (injuries costs are minimal compared to long term chronic conditions which exercise can help control (if you can and have access to the exercise!)).

This is more than short sighted - looks like I am not the only one who thinks so.

The same park seems to charge for the football club to use it on Saturday mornings - is that normal practice?

Now obviously we are angry - mainly because as geeks neither of us has liked sport that much - that is because we perceived it as aggressive and bully-tastic - this changed with the Olympics where we got to see it more as striving for personal bests and being the best you can be - a world of self improvement.

We did not see the climbing and shooting as sport they were activities we liked - again that barrier came down. We were no longer doing those things because - money. We spend too much on the kids clubs and activities but that is because we have learnt that a) confidence is important and b) they are both girls related to me and yes they maybe lucky and take after Al but.... they need their core muscle strength and they need good metabolisms and they need strong lungs and hearts.

But we are paying alot for that and many don't have that (we don't really have that and rely on people giving classes or equipment instead of presents for the girls).

And the thing is it isn't just me - Alaric is actually the one who takes part in the park run as part of him sorting his body out - for years he had bad back pain but it got worse and worse - its siatica, he's lucky the Dr spotted the problem - we had to pay a physio to sort it as though it would have resulted in him needing a hip replacement in 2 yrs time the nhs could not pay for the preventative yanking the leg back out of its socket but they would pay for the hip replacement :/ So obv. he had loads of physio ad stuff to do afterwards - it's acting up again which is a bad sign but it is more than the 2 yrs on now - he is working on his general muscle tone and stuff.

He does Krav, that costs money... but he also does park run - he was running by himself but motivation is hard - but park run... that is different.

It's free, it's all together, it's mildly competitive but mainly supportive.

I was/am looking forward to running in it but am still struggling with getting round the block - but hey I am getting round the block and now mainly not weeing myself in the process (yes literally and yes probably TMI). We are planning on including the kids which is another thing taking kids to gyms doesn't work - it used to when I was a kid - I remember sitting at the edge of the gym whilst my dad and uncles weight trained but that doesn't happen anymore - so what do you do with the kids whilst you use the gym?!

So we plan to run as a family but that has to wait on Mary levelling up with Ballet as the times currently clash.

I hope Bristol does not set a trend - it would be a shame and a tragedy to loose something that is designed to help everybody.

(p.s. written whilst Jean was at her pre-school free running club which is fab but not sure how wide spread those are!)

Ok so I side tracked myself a lot but basically park runs make running and exercise accessible to everyone allowing a reduction in the impact poverty can have - it is a good thing why break it. (or course you also need access to tech so we need the libraries as well for people to get the full goodness of the thing and sadly also the foodbanks :(.) Also positive impact on health, attitudes.

Here is the petition.