Oxford’s International Women’s Festival Poetry Competition (by sarah)

I'm going to be entering this competition - it's one pound a poem and the theme is women and well being. Deadline is the 5th of November so I thought I'd let you all know about it. I'm entering 5 odd poems covering a range of what is termed 'women's' issues but what I think of as far broader than that. I'm even sending in Charcoal which I wrote after reading an article in the National Geographic about women in the Congo. There is no restriction in the sexes where the competition is concerned (otherwise I would not be entering).

Blocked Drains (by sarah)

The windows have been being repainted and bits being repaired which is nice except the rotting frames are just being hardened and repainted again :/ Which is what was done to them two odd years ago and now I can't open my favourite window anymore (the one I broke before as it was so rotten and Barbara insisted only the broken part be replaced - well she is paying). The frame is so rotten now I risk breaking the glass and stuff :/

Anyway apart from not having been told the guy was coming - I am very happy with getting fresh paint on stuff especially as fixed the bent metal window in the front that was letting a whopping breeze into the house (the one that Barbara had decided to jimmy open whilst we where evacuated to London in 2007 so that the cats could roam the house why we weren't here).

But he did manage to get bits and bobs in our drain outside the kitchen window - this is where all the kitchen sink and stuff drains out of a pipe into a grated hole in the floor. Now I tend to clear this drain every few weeks anyway as it has a tendency to end up with plants growing in it and leaf litter from the garden but obviously this is a bit hard for me at the moment.

Looking at it I thought it looked a little blocked so mentioned it to Al in the hope he'd get it cleared later in the day - I then forgot about it and put the washing machine on. I then get an irate Barbara at the door because we've obviously blocked the drain (probably with baby wipes) and it's all coming up through the manhole cover. Alaric comes to look and starts going on about rods and things and I'm like 'no the drain's just got a bit clogged so the water from the washing machine can't drain.'

We go back inside to find stuff to sort it - Alaric is arguing with me about it needing rods whilst I'm collecting gloves and a black sack. I'd told Barbara we would sort it, hobble back outside to find she's got a crow bar and is about to prize the cover off the manhole - which both her and Al were insisting the water was coming up through. I think I shouted at everybody and went and cleared the grill of a broken bit of paint pot and lots of paint flecks plus some leaves. The water instantly starts draining into the drain :/

I then get told that me and Al are irresponsible as we didn't stop the water and now there was soapy water draining onto some plants on the quay. As Barbara brushed excess water back up the gully bit to go down the drain. I then pointed out it was soap nuts anyway so shouldn't be too harmful and she agreed.

I was so hacked off at both of them. Especially as it wasn't even because I haven't been clearing it as regularly as normal. Alaric said he thought the pipes drained in under the ground :/ so what I was saying hadn't made sense.

The main issue for me was that I then ended up shaking with pain and walking and even getting myself out of bed was a no go for the next few days 🙁 I get so sad that I can see what needs doing and not actually do it.

Food and Dyslexia et al (by sarah)

Food would appear to play a large part in how bad things like Dyslexia, Dyspraxia and ADHA get, or how the symptoms show. It has been suggested that diary plays a large part in this and I have to say that I have personally noticed a coralation with this but I due have food intollerances. These may or may not be connected to the problems however excessive diary does seem to act things up as does general none home cooked food to be honest. Obviously there is the issue I have with food colourings, caffine and sugar combinations - I assume these are part of the ADHD but apart from caffine can find no mention of them.

The other one is that Omega-3 (I think) oil seems to play a huge part too - or at least it's absence. This is interesting as it plays straight into the joint issues and for me at least the pain management stuff. Add in collagen difficiences and the like and I came to a conclusion (this is mine there is no research on this - it's just something I have observed with me!). We basically need fish and shelf-fish type nutrition in our diet to remain healthy - this appears to be true of many people anyway but more so with those with Dyspraxia and stuff.

Of course this would be a situation that is getting worse as modern diets are down to a fraction of the amount of sea food it once had in it - on top of that we are killing the seas and they may not be able to provide for us 🙁 I think you can get the oils from things like flax seeds so there are veggi options though they may take more digesting.

I have noticed it is not just me with these conditions and either the chronic pain nor the food intollerences - they crop up in combinations startingly frequently on the forums and help sites I've seen - people asking are their intollerences/allergies part of the condition etc...

This is something I really feel would benieft from some more research done on it 🙂

Social Expectations (by sarah)

Conditions like dyslexia, dyspraxia and ADHD are supposed to be more preverlant in males but even the NHS seem to think this could be biased. Why would it be biased?

The answer is social expectation of girls - something which with girls improving in leaps and bounds in exams now they are being allowed and ecouraged to do so - may become more evident. If a girl is uncoordinated it's ok she's a girl and they can't catch balls and things anyway can they? Less so now but spelling? Well girls don't need to do well at school unless they are going to be a secretary (this one is almost erradicated but it did exist and in some places still does - I am talking the UK here by the way before everybody gets confused!). If a girl has trouble concentrating well girls are quiet and dreamy anyway aren't they?

I think biased is probably very artificial and as our understanding of children's development increases so this biased will disappear!

However there is another issue with these disorders and society and that is the conclusion that most of the public are still drawing i.e. = lazy child, naughty child or thick child with parents who can't come to terms with it. Now These sorts of cases do exist but they are the minority not the majority.

And worse this is sort of a self fore filling prophesy - if you take an intelligent kid and tell them they are lazy, naughty, can't-do's - that is exactly what they will turn into. In a world where they are frustrated and no one will help them or are even hostile to them, they will be hostile back, they will stop going (playing truant and getting in with people they should be kept safe from). So instead of having a slightly kack-handed physist searching for exo-planets you get Mr 3 Kids in a council house by age 21. Instead of the deptudy manager you get Dude Is Run the Gangs Round 'Ere. Instead of the artist selling her pots and boosting our economy you get Miss Heart Attack Victim dead behind the flats from glue sniffing at seventeen. Instead of the teacher you get Miss Recluse scared of her own shadow and unable to get a job langishing. All this potential wasted.

And the thing is - it's not just people who don't know about the conditions - sometimes people who have struggled with them themselves and have put in coping techniques so well they now no longer believe they have anything wronge with them. Even when they can't sit still for more than 5 minutes even as a grown-up. This is akin to the business person who has made it by hard work and luck to drag themselves out of poverty - they can not see the luck aspect only the work - and yes they have achieved great things but they still would not have managed it without the luck and yet they exactly the people who point to themselves and say 'see I did it the rest of you are just being lazy'.

Don't get me wrong I think that things can be made worse by environment with these conditions and like it or not the parents are not always going to be able to help. They may just not know or they may not be capable of helping or sadly just not care. This is one of the reasons it is so important for there to be Social Peramitters to help these children and adults - and yes I count myself in there - I have been extrememly lucky and things could have been different. So this means educational help, medical help where needed and maybe social workers or the like for those adults who are server enough that they really are just going to be at loss in the world. And it's not that I'm saying people should be giving freedom passes - most want to be useful and helpful - to give something back or to support their families but they may need help in finding the sorts of things they can do.

Jean is in Business! (by sarah)

Jean has repeatedly been coming up with business ideas which though sweet aren't really workable for a five year old. Like collecting stones to sell to concrete makers etc...

So when she asked about making candles and selling them we thought we'd encourage this business venture as she has agreed that they would also make nice presants for people (sorry guys!).

It turned out we had two candle making kits in the house already and we have been collecting candle ends and stuff for far too long meaning to turn them into candles!

Jean and Daddy made four candles and did a little prep for a future funky candle or three! In the process we found that two of the moulds do not work as they are too big to be made out of a flexible plastic and the wax stuck and collapsed the molds inward as the wax contracted on cooling.

Daddy has bought one candle from Jean already to be his office candle 🙂 He says he only did most of the work and it's only made out of his candle ends - I pointed out Jean designed it as she had decided what colour to use etc... The two smaller candles she's made she wants to use for halloween as they are black (made with candles ends again).

Anyway I have agreed she can sell her candles at the village craft fair and we took her £2 savings and the pound from her first sale and went to buy some more candle things today. Hobby Craft was a bit of a disappointment but we got a beeswax kit and two lots of dye to use on the candle ends etc... we already have. We were going to pick up a mold only but they where so expensive there it was unbelievable!

(I am wondering how this will work out tax wise - as Jean's too young to work isn't she? I suppose it will just get added to mine or Daddy's?).

We are having to work a bit on costings with Jean as she wanted to sell the candles for 5p each 🙂 And maybe some customer care is needed as she is tending to insist that people buy the candles!

Jean has to pay back the £9 I have lent her and stall rental before she gets to keep any of the money, though we will probably 'buy' any we use for gifts. She is unbelievable excited about this whole thing :/

We will see how long it lasts!